Mabel Wants a Dirt Devil
This is the letter I got from aunt Gertrude today. Gertrude raised me and my brother. She was always trying to save money and energy. I remember her making us wash dishes in the bathtub. The water got hotter and the light bulb in there was a hundred watts. The other rooms had 40 watt bulbs or they had burned out and she was too tight to buy more. We used a lot of candles.
Anyways, here’s the letter:
“Dearest Mabel,
I was glad to hear from you, even if you are asking me for money. But since you want such a sensible item and a Dirt Devil at that, I am mailing you a check. Just make sure you spend what’s left over on food for you and the baby. Lord knows that worthless man of yours would head straight for the liquor store if he got his hands on my money.
I was at the doctor’s office yesterday having my thyroid checked and read in a magazine that the new AccuCharge Stick Vac and Hand Vac use 70% less energy, so I want you to make sure that the Dirt Devil you buy is one of those AccuCharge.
Tell Walter down at Sears that it is the first cordless to earn Energy Star approval. He’ll know which machine you are talking about.
Take care of yourself and the baby. If you ever change your mind about leaving that rattlesnake the spare room is all made up and ready.
Fondly,
Aunt Gertrude”
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